It’s time to enjoy those fabulous 50s

So this is how it feels to be 50.

It’s a lot less traumatic than 40, that’s for sure. When I reached my 40^th orbit around the sun I not only felt the anxiety of a mid-life crisis but I had the added stress of having given up my dream job to run my own business, which tanked and took me into bankruptcy. On top of that, the bank was foreclosing on my home.

Here we are 10 orbits later and, as my friends are taking great pleasure in reminding me, I’ve moved on from mid-life to over the hill. When I hit 40, I felt like half my life was gone and I had failed to do anything worthwhile. I hadn’t left my mark on this earth. My major goals were not accomplished.

The big five-oh is a lot less stressful. I have a much more carefree attitude toward life. While I still haven’t accomplished my major goals just yet, they are in progress. Funny thing is, I feel a lot less pressure and anxiety over them. I’ve learned to accept that my world won’t come to an end if it comes to an end and I’ve not accomplished everything I want to.

If that last sentence confused you, it did me too. Essentially, I accept that God has bigger plans for me than I do. I’ll be doing whatever he has in mind a lot longer after I die than I’ll spend piddling in my own mess while I’m alive and kicking. That work will be much more important and fulfilling than anything on my bucket list.

That being said, my bucket list has become much more interesting and important to me as the gray hairs creep into my scalp and my hips spread. My bucket list looks a lot different than it did 10 years ago even though it still has many of the same things in it.

Tops on my list for the last 30 years is writing a book. I am deep into that project now and hope to finish my first one in a few months. One of my bucket list items was completed at Sealybration a few weeks ago when I took my first helicopter ride. It’s one of the few types of aircraft I had not flown in. Since spacecraft is not a likely possibility, that leaves only a glider and those new water-propelled jet packs on my flight deck.

What has grown in importance with my bucket list is not so much what I do, but the ones I do it with. Last week I surprised my middle son Luke by taking him to the Delorean showroom in Houston. It was his dream to see the car made famous by the “Back to the Future” movies and we were not disappointed. They had one decked out like the time machine from the movies and we got to sit in it and take pictures to our hearts’ content.

Was it on my bucket list to see a Delorean? No. But connecting on a deeper level with my son and seeing the smile on his face most certainly was. The more I can do that with each of my kids and my wife, the better my life will be.

I find that engaging in their interests and making them happy is what makes me happy. Oddly enough, we share a lot of similar interests, so doing things for them is a lot like doing things for myself. It’s all in the attitude. Those times when I do things for them that don’t interest me, I find that I have opened my mind and expanded my world just a little bit more. It also brings me deeper into their worlds and strengthens the bond between us.

It’s like I’ve said in my columns before, once you learn that your life isn’t about you but about what you do for others, the better your life will be. I guess that’s why 50 feels so much better than 40 did.