Mayor responding to citizen concerns

I have to give credit where credit is due. I have recently been critical of the way Hempstead Mayor Michael Wolfe has dealt with people who come to council with complaints and concerns.
I said he was stifling the citizens and apparently ignoring their concerns to push his own agenda. On Monday night, Wolfe demonstrated very clearly that he has been listening. There was a lot of discussion on various issues. He has seen to it that restoration work is being done to headstones in city cemeteries. There was more give-and-take between himself, the council and the audience than usual. His mayor’s comments portion of the meeting addressed many of the issues people have been asking about, including updates by project officials.
On the other hand, Wolfe traveled down a rocky road in pushing for road repairs along 18th Street, right in front of Greater St. Peter’s Baptist Church, which is pastored by Alderman Fred Thomas III. Thomas voted for the street improvements when they first came up earlier this year, which was clearly a conflict of interest.
At Monday night’s meeting his error was caught and Thomas was prohibited from voting on the remainder of the street improvements, which upgrades all of 18th between Rice and Washington streets. That left the council in a tie vote for doing the improvements with Ben Tibbs and Emma Washington voting for it and Katherine Ragston and Patricia Chernosky voting against. Wolfe broke the tie in favor, casting a rare tie-breaker vote.
More than one person has noticed that the road getting fixed benefits Thomas. Several people, especially Ragston and Chernosky, feel other streets should be a higher priority for repairs.
An example that stands out in my mind surfaced last July when council told Alfred Restivo, who lives at 25th Street and Colorado, that he could not put a gate across the city’s easement that runs through the middle of his back yard. When I saw that Colorado was nothing more than a cleared path through the woods with little to delineate it as a road, I had to wonder how and why it was considered a city street. Parts of Colorado are only accessible by off-road vehicles.
There are many roads in town that need to be improved, 18th being one of them. I’m on the side that feels some of the more-traveled roads should have been a higher priority. At the least the mayor should have consulted with council and city staff on the priorities. If he did, nothing has been said of it.
I am not saying or insinuating in any way that there are any exchanges of political favors or backroom dealings on the road improvements. Both Mayor Wolfe and Alderman Thomas are pastors and honorable, God-fearing men. There are plenty of other people, however, who are trying to connect the dots and I hear about it all the time.
Lately I’ve been hearing about other rumors related to City Hall, but so far they are unsubstantiated. Please people, don’t bring me rumors and gossip. If you’ve got a gripe or concern, show me your proof.

On the road again
Every weekday I drive from Rosenberg to Hempstead and back. Along that route I routinely see a lot of wildlife. Most of it, however, is squished on the road. On any given day I can expect to see raccoons, opossums, dogs, cats, skunks and armadillos keeping their eternal vigil of the pavement.
I don’t know who is responsible for cleaning up the mess or if it’s left to the vultures to care for. It does pain me, however, to see so many good raccoon pelts go to waste. Raccoons have been my favorite animal since the fifth grade. At one point in my life I used to tan hides of small game, mostly rabbits. Seeing a freshly dead coon with a carcass in good shape makes me want to stop and collect it for its pelt.
I understand that’s against the law in Texas. It’s also gross and kind of creepy, but that’s beside the point. Many of the animals I see are no less fit for human use than if they had been shot with a hunting rifle. Since I drive the same route morning and evening, I know which ones are fresh.
Given the price of furs these days, I think I may try to moonlight as a carrion reclamation specialist. After all, it’s a green way of recycling natural debris. It keeps the roads clean and could put some cash in my pocket. I balk, however, at using it to put meat on the table.
I’m joking, of course, but I’ve known of people who have done this for both meat and pelts. If there are any carrion reclamation specialists out there, please let me know. I think it would make a very interesting story.

Don't stop showing love for your spouse

OK guys, it’s safe to come out now. Valentine’s Day is past.
I can’t say that I’m a big fan of Valentine’s Day. While I think it’s nice to have a day to celebrate love and romance, I dislike having someone else telling me to romance my wife. I don’t like the pressure of having to buy cards, flowers, gifts, dinner out, etc., especially when it doesn’t fit in the family budget.
I think I continually express love to my wife and am very capable of providing my own bouts of romance. On the other hand, there are plenty of women who hold onto Valentine’s Day with a death grip because it’s one of the few times a year their spouse or significant other gives them the attention they deserve.
Guys, loving your wife is something you should do continuously. Most women need to have regular assurances and demonstrations of your love. Most of us think of love as a noun, as a feeling. While that’s true, love is also a verb. You have to put it into action. You have to make the choice every day to love your spouse. Even if you don’t feel like it, you have an obligation to demonstrate your love.
Too often, right after the wedding, most guys relax and treat their wife as a trophy they have just won and placed on the mantle. They quit investing emotionally in her. She becomes part of the furniture or a tool for intimacy. A real man will never stop pursuing his wife’s heart. He will put her interests and needs before his own.
In case you haven’t noticed, wedding vows are not some ceremonial mumbo-jumbo you say at the altar. A vow is your word, your promise and commitment. Marriage vows are meant to be permanent, an unbreakable bond between husband and wife. A wedding vow is “’til death do us part”, not “for as long as I feel like it” or “until something better comes along.”
Christian author Dr. Gary Chapman has a popular book out called The Five Love Languages. In it he has discovered that most people speak a primary love language. When you speak your spouse’s love language, you fill their love tank, keeping that “in love” feeling alive. Failure to do that can lead to anger and resentment.
The five love languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. Most of us will have a primary and secondary love language. A lot of good marriages go stale or sour because spouses fail to speak the proper love language. A guy can shower his wife with a big house, nice cars, and fancy jewelry or perform all kinds of household chores and honey-dos, but she still won’t feel loved by him if her primary love language is quality time. The time spent buying those gifts or doing those chores would be better spent snuggled up with her and engaging in conversation.
Another thing that I have learned is that, outside of a relationship with Jesus Christ, the relationship with your wife is the most important one you will ever have in this life. You need to treat it like it was the most important thing on earth, because it is. Your relationship should take precedence over that of parents, children, friends, family and career. It should be subordinate to only one relationship – the one you have with the loving God who created all things.
This does not mean you should focus on your wife to the exclusion of all others. That much of an obsession is not healthy. Relationships need to be kept in perspective and priority. You are not going to grow old with your golfing buddies, but you need those relationships to add balance to your life. If you have to make a choice between wife and buddies, your wife should be the clear winner.
While your relationship with your children is vitally important, they also need to see and feel the strength and security of the relationship of their parents. That is the root from which they spring. As children grow up and marry, they are expected to leave their parents and cleave to their spouse (that’s cleave, as in cling or adhere, not split or separate).
To me, demonstrating love to my wife is a never-ending thing. That’s why I find it mildly offensive to be prodded by a holiday to do what should come naturally. I should note, however, that failure to do something special for your wife on Valentine’s Day could have dire consequences … like the next time you want to go golfing with your buddies or the four-fold restitution you will have to make the next year on Feb. 14.

Rookie mistakes lead to Rookie lessons

Jim Morris, the real man behind the Disney movie based on his life called “The Rookie”, was the guest speaker at my church Sunday.
Morris became famous for becoming the oldest rookie in Major League Baseball history in 1999-2000 when he pitched for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. He was a 35-year-old high school teacher and baseball coach when his team made him promise to try out for the pros if they won the district championship. They did and he did.
He tried out with a scout, thinking that he was just fulfilling an obligation to the boys and had no chance. But his blistering 98-mph fastballs proved otherwise. What kept Morris from pursuing his dreams in his 20s was the same problem that plagues most of us. He believed what others said about him.
He lived with an abusive father who was a Navy recruiter. He moved a lot and attended 30 schools before graduating high school. Growing up, he was told by his father and several of his teachers that he was stupid and would never amount to anything. He was a standout football player with Major League Baseball ambitions. His football coach told him he would never make it and talked every college that wanted to give him a football scholarship out of their offers.
A high school graduate with less than adequate grades and no hope of going to college, he tried out for the minor leagues, but multiple shoulder surgeries ended that career. He went on to get his degree and became a science teacher and baseball coach in Big Lake, Texas. “By the way, there is no lake in Big Lake,” he said.
In Big Lake, even the teachers said the kids would never amount to anything. They were losers who would never make it out of West Texas. They told Morris the same old pessimistic garbage that he grew up with. His players, however, believed in him. They made a deal with him that if they won the district championship that he would try out for the Majors. The rest, as they say, is history.
Today Morris is a motivational speaker and a devout Christian. He teaches and preaches on the theme of Remember Who You Are. His message is simple: Don’t believe the naysayers and pursue your dreams relentlessly. He said God didn’t close the doors in his life; others did with their words and attitudes. Once he learned to trust God and pursue his dreams, God blessed him beyond his imagination.
As Morris was sharing his story, I was in rapt attention. So were my kids, which is rare. Afterward, I got in line to meet him and told him how much his story meant to me. I told him I couldn’t relate to the part of having athletic power, but I know too well the feeling of being told you’re too stupid to amount to anything.
It hurts, and when you hear it often enough or from someone in a position of authority over you, you believe it. I’ve had teachers who told me I’d never go to college (BA in journalism from Adams State College, 1987). Coming out of college, I had many editors tell me I’d never make it in newspapers. My professional newspaper career spans nearly 23 years.
In elementary school, not only was I last picked for teams, but often there was an argument about who had to take me. I played three sports in high school (four if you count intramural bowling), lettering in two.
As I sat there listing to Morris, I was almost brought to tears. My eyes welled up hearing how he was made to feel worthless. They also welled up with laughter, because he’s a very funny speaker.
Morris is 19 months older than I am. One of his drawbacks in his youth was a cocky self-centeredness. I was that way from high school and well into my 20s. Life can serve up a huge piece of humble pie, especially if you lose sight of your dreams and God’s plan for your life.
I think the key to success is to align your dreams to God’s calling for you and then to pursue them even more aggressively than you think you are capable of. You must be cautious as you do this because you don’t want to do it for selfish reasons. Do all that you do to the glory of God. Serve others before serving yourself. Don’t compromise your beliefs and values.
These are some good lessons to learn, even if they come from a rookie.

No Lone Rangers in Order of the Arrow

Last week I wrote about my struggle between going to a Lone Ranger event or staying for a special Boy Scout honor my son was receiving. I opted to stay with my son and have no regrets.
As the owner emeritus of the Lone Ranger Fan Club, I would have loved to have been at the Texas Rangers Hall of Fame and Museum for the Lone Ranger Fan Day last Saturday when they unveiled a new Lone Ranger museum collection. As fun as that would have been, nothing there could top what I felt when Wesley was tapped out for induction into the Order of the Arrow.
The Order of the Arrow is an honor camper fraternity. You have to be selected by your peers to join. Wesley had no clue until his name was called that he was selected. We managed to keep it a secret from him for a couple months. He will have is ordeal in March, at which time he will formally become a member.
My induction into the Order of the Arrow about 25 to 30 years ago was very unique. I was tapped out at a Scout Show, but missed the ordeal and never did anything else about it. Fast-forward a couple of years and I was working as a mountain man at the Ben Delatour Scout Ranch in Red Feather Lakes, Colo. I did that job for three of my four years on camp staff and loved it.
One of the really cool things each week was the Order of the Arrow tap-out ceremony. It featured a big Indian dance by the OA dance team. I volunteered to bang the drum and did so with pleasure. It wasn’t until sometime in my final year that it occurred to anyone that I was not in the Order of the Arrow. To rectify that, they made me an honorary member with full membership privileges. My service as a drummer served as my ordeal.
What’s unusual about that is that I have never heard of anyone else becoming an honorary member. I never did a formal ordeal and never participated in any other OA activities. I still proudly wear my Kola Lodge OA patch on my Scout shirt, but that’s been the extent of it.
For those of you who don’t understand Scoutspeak, the Order of the Arrow is a program of the Boy Scouts of America and follows a Native American theme. Members belong to a local lodge.
This is how the BSA describes OA: “For more than 90 years, the Order of the Arrow (OA) has recognized Scouts and Scouters who best exemplify the Scout Oath and Law in their daily lives. This recognition provides encouragement for others to live these ideals as well. Arrowmen are known for maintaining camping traditions and spirit, promoting year-round and long term resident camping, and providing cheerful service to others. OA service, activities, adventures, and training for youth and adults are models of quality leadership development and programming that enrich and help to extend Scouting to America’s youth.”
Camping is a big part of Scouting. It not only teaches basic cooking and survival skills, it also helps the boys learn about the environment and the importance of protecting it. The native people were the best stewards of the land this country ever had. They provide the perfect role model for teaching these skills and values to the young men.
Through Scouting and, more specifically the Order of the Arrow, the boys learn about Indian ways and traditions. They learn the history and heritage of the native peoples and develop a respect for who they were and how they cared for Mother Nature.
There just are not that many organizations that teach those values and skills outside of Scouting. In an age when the thing is to go green, and the environment is a top concern, these are valuable lessons the boys are learning and putting into practice.
Now Wesley will have a chance to develop these skills and gain this knowledge that will help him as he moves into manhood. It’s exciting as a father to be there as he takes this first step. I know the things he learns in the Boy Scouts will carry him far. There is little that makes a dad more proud than to see his child not only follow in his footsteps, but to blaze his own trail.
If I had gone to the Lone Ranger event like I wanted to, I would have missed this first step and might not have had the chance to help him on his journey.
Welcome to the brotherhood, my son. I can’t wait to see where this adventure takes you.