Father's Day a reminder of the importance of dads

 

“We are calling on men, all men — the successful and the unsuccessful, the affluent and the poor, the married and the unmarried — to come and claim their children. You can run the biggest drug cartel in America or win the Super Bowl, but if you haven’t claimed your children, you are not a man. No matter how useless or hopeless a father may think he is, his role is simply to be there. If he makes that commitment, he is a much better man than he thought he was.” – Bill Cosby (before he was disgraced)

 

Father’s Day is of my favorite holidays. I like it not because I’m a father and it makes me feel good about being a dad. I don’t need a holiday for that. I like it because it puts fatherhood in a positive light.

Fatherhood has taken a beating in the culture wars in the past 30-40 years. It’s a shame, because we need fathers more than ever. I don’t mean men who get women pregnant, but men who step up and are actively involved in raising their children. We need men who love their wives, care for their children and rise up to protect their family.

Being a father is one of the absolute joys of my life. What matters most in life to me is this: My faith in God, being a husband to Sandy, and being a father to Heather, Wesley, Luke, and Colton. I hope someday to add grandchildren to that list.

I remember well the feelings of excitement, joy, and pride while watching the birth of three of my children (Wesley was 4 years old when I married his mother). I was equally excited when I adopted Wesley as my own son.

There is nothing like the feeling of snuggling with your newborn baby. Those feelings are only magnified the first time he or she says, “I love you, Daddy!” I remember the feelings of peace when one of my children fell asleep in my arms or next to me on the couch. I love story time, gathering for family prayers, playing games, going camping, celebrating birthdays and other holidays, and just doing life together.

Being a father isn’t always easy. At times it can be very difficult and sometimes painful. It’s no fun when you have to enforce discipline, deal with injuries, break up fights, or cope with being lied to by your precious little ones. I think the things that hurt the most are not the times when your children fail, but when you fail as a parent. We all make mistakes, but life goes on.

Some of life’s greatest moments come when your children succeed at something. From winning scores, getting A’s on tests, learning new skills, and graduating from school, there are endless moments big and small that a father treasures forever.

Inevitably, there comes that time when your children grow up and leave home. It’s a bittersweet moment when you know it’s their time to fly but they won’t be there every day to kiss goodnight or hug first thing in the morning. Even when your children leave home, your job as a father never ends, it just transitions.

Wesley is married and lives in Florida. Heather is an avowed bachelorette living in Colorado. Colton, our youngest, left the nest a year ago and is working for Arms of Hope in Medina. Luke, our middle son, lives in San Marcos and on July 7 will marry Samantha “Sammy” Owen.

I’m thrilled to be adding in-law children to the family, but I’d be even more excited to welcome grandchildren (hint, hint!).

As I reflect on the joys of fatherhood, I have to wonder why so many men shun the responsibility. Our jails are populated with people whose fathers were absent, alcoholic, or abusive. Imagine the difference it would make if more men stepped up to embrace fatherhood. Think of the generational cycles of poverty and crime that would end with each father who manned up and cared for their children.

I’d like to see a world where men, and fathers in particular, are given their due respect and likewise earn it. Being a father is an incredible joy and an awesome responsibility. I’ll conclude with one of my favorite quotes: Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad.

Happy Father’s Day, y’all!