Porn a cancer in the community

Warning: If there are little eyes peering through this paper, please stop them from reading this column this week. I want to talk about an adult topic.
This past week I had a painful, gut-wrenching decision to make. I’m still new to Hereford and my list of friends here is rather small. But I had to write about one of them being indicted on a charge of taking indecent liberties with a child.
My heart wanted to keep it out of the paper. My head knew it had to be there. I couldn’t show my friend favoritism and keep my integrity in tact the next time a situation like this arose. I had to treat him like I would anyone else in that situation.
I don’t know the particulars of the case. But it brings to mind a much larger problem that has infected our culture like an incurable plague. It’s called porn.
You may be asking yourself why on earth the editor of a small town family newspaper wants to talk about something so reprehensible. The answer is simple. It’s the proverbial elephant in the middle of the room that no one wants to talk about. It’s the cancer that you know you have but won’t treat because you hope it will just go away.
Guys, when was the last time you saw a picture of a naked woman? How many days or even hours ago was it? If I looked at the history on your Internet browser, what would I see? Would your wife, mother or daughter be embarrassed to see what photos or movies you’ve downloaded or rented lately? When was the last time you engaged in a little self-gratification?
Whoa, hold on there partner. Am I hitting a little too close to home? Are you feeling uncomfortable? If so, read on, because I’m going after the ladies next.
Let me ask you ladies, have you ever caught your husband, father or son looking at porn on the Internet? Maybe it’s a magazine hidden in a drawer or an image hiding on his cell phone. Better yet, when was the last time you asked the man in your life about porn and his access to it.
And ladies, if you think I’m picking on the men here, I’m not. Statistics show that a rising number of women are getting into porn. But it’s not just porn. Women today are showing more skin in certain areas of their bodies than ever before. If you don’t think a little flash of cleavage is harmful, think again. Women do as much or more to crank up the sex drive in men than they think they do.
Now, at this point you’re probably thinking I’m either some kind of prude or a pervert or both. My point here is porn is deadly to marriages, families and our society. The average man or woman can’t hope to measure up to the things that the porn industry is putting out.
Guys, ask your wife sometime if she’d mind if you put a picture of Miss January on your computer desktop. Better yet, ask her if she’d like to try and do some of the things in bed that you saw another couple do on your computer.
What’s the matter, chicken?
Ladies, how do you think your husband would react if he found out that you had a membership on a Web site for swingers? Do you suppose he’d mind if you put a racy photo of yourself on your blog or MySpace page?
It’s the digital age now and technology makes photographing and video recording sexy images or acts easy and as private or public as you want it to be. That makes it dangerous in many ways.
I bring this subject up because it has been something I’ve been researching for a while. In my last few weeks at the Amarillo newspaper, I wrote a huge package of stories about sexual addictions. I talked to sex addicts, therapists and even the wife of a sex addict. I saw how powerful the addiction is and how devastating it is to the families.
The story never made it to print. One of my biggest hurdles was not getting guys to talk openly about their problem, but in convincing the powers that be that the story was important and needed to be told.
I have recently listened to a book on CD called “The Dirty Little Secret” by Craig Gross, founder of XXX Church (www.xxxchurch.com). I can’t recommend this book enough to guys, say in their late teens on up to great-grandparenthood.
It gives you not only a Christian perspective on porn, but it also takes you deep inside the porn industry and reveals the dark, destructive side of pornography.
If I have your attention, please think about how this four-letter word, this dirty little secret, is impacting your life and your family. Remember this, there are only two kinds of sex addicts: those who have been caught and those who are about to get caught.
If you think you need help, get it. A good place to start is www.xxxchurch.com. Locally, I strongly recommend New Hope Resources and Counseling in Amarillo (www.newhoperesources.com) or talking with your pastor. Keep in mind, however, that a third to a half of all pastors have or have had a problem with sexual addiction. They are, after all, just guys like you and me. The only difference is they’re trained to help. They understand.
The worst thing you can do is nothing at all. You can’t break the addiction by yourself. Don’t delay. Don’t let the dirty little secret ruin your life or the lives of your loved ones. It’s not worth it.