Time to break out the suit and beard

Ho, ho, hoo-boy!
How did I get myself into this again? This weekend I will once again be donning the red suit and white beard and playing the part of Santa Claus. I will be making my acting debut this weekend in First Colony Church of Christ’s “Radio City Sugar Land: Winter’s Eve 1948.”
It’s a small but significant part at the end of the musical drama. The Christmas program looks like it’s going to be a lot of fun. I’m really looking forward to it. I have to admit, though, that I thought I was done playing Santa.
I played Santa at Twin Peaks Mall in Longmont, Colo., a few years ago. I did it for two seasons and had a lot of fun with it. But it takes a lot of time away from the family, especially around the holidays.
I must have done a good job at it, because my own kids sat on my lap and didn’t realize it was me. In fact, Wesley even commented that I sounded a lot like Daddy. I said, “Maybe your Daddy sounds a lot like me.” That threw him.
It wasn’t until we were moving down here last year that Wesley found my beard. That’s how he discovered my secret identity. The beard was a keepsake from the job. (Trust me, you don’t use another man’s beard. They just toss them at the end of the season.)
It was fun seeing friends and children of friends come through the line. Many of them had no clue I was the one to whom they were confiding their Christmas wishes. It was really interesting to listen to the children. You could tell what was popular or what ads were being pushed at a particular time.
The ones I liked hearing the most were from the kids who really knew and desired what they asked for. You could tell when they wanted something special and it was important to them. Sometimes you’d get the politically-correct kids who would ask for things for their parents or for world peace or something like that. Most of the time, though, the kids wanted whatever toy they had just seen in a store or advertised on TV.
Playing Santa is not without its pitfalls. Every once and a while you would get the obnoxious teen who knows you’re a fake and wants to prove it to everyone. You also get the little kids who are scared to death of Santa and won’t go near you.
I think my worst experience was the time I was handed a baby that would not stop crying. The poor, exasperated mother took the infant from me and grabbed my beard in the process. She nearly ripped my head off as she walked away. I had to leap from the chair and follow her with my beard stretched to the breaking point and my hat starting to pull off my head.
When I recovered and sat back down, I looked down the long line of youngsters and saw a lot of wide eyes and dropped jaws.
Ah yes, those were the good ole days. I have very fond memories of that time but no real desire to be a mall Santa ever again. So that’s why I was caught off guard when Sandy told me they needed a Santa in the church program and suggested I do it. I guess it makes sense. After all, I come with experience.
At first, Sandy was the only one in our family doing the show. She loves musical dramas and had just done “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat” at the church. After she got going in Winter’s Eve, she recruited our youngest son, Colton, to play the part of a small boy. He has one line, but is on stage quite a bit. Now I’m in it and Wesley has been recruited to work the spotlights. That just leaves my middle son, Luke. I guess he’ll play the part of an audience member.
If you’re interested in coming out to the show, it will be Dec. 12 and 13 at 7 p.m. at First Colony Church of Christ, 2140 First Colony Blvd., in Sugar Land. Tickets are $5 each or five for $15. A portion of the proceeds will benefit the Second Mile Mission Center.
Just tell ’em Santa sent you.