Far-flung family

 

When Colton graduated from Texas A&M on May 8, we had some family visit us for the occasion.

It was wonderful to have family members with us that we don’t get to see very often. Heather came for her brother’s graduation. She just moved back to Colorado after living for two years in Washington State. It has been two years since we last saw her in person. Luke came up from Rosenberg for the weekend. Our oldest son, Wesley, lives in Florida and was unable to attend. My brother, Chip, came to visit from Colorado. I get to see him once or twice a year on average.

It became clear to me over that weekend that it is a Southern family tradition to move far away from your family of origin when you leave the nest. My children are doing it. I did it. My parents did it. And as I look up the family tree, I see generations of westward mobility, often leaving family behind.

It’s not that we don’t like each other or can’t get along. There just appears to be an insatiable wanderlust that drives Southerns to migrate and explore. For two years my family had all three U.S. coasts covered. It’s still that way with my son and a cousin in Florida, our niece in North Carolina, Sandy’s sister’s family in South Carolina, many of my cousins on my father’s side still living in California and some of Sandy’s cousins and an uncle living in Washington.

Dad, Chip and Heather are holding down the fort in Colorado, along with Chip’s son and his new bride. Sandy and I are firmly entrenched in Texas along with Luke and Colton, our two youngest. Luke opted to remain in the Richmond/Rosenberg area when we moved to Brazos County two years ago. Colton left right after graduation weekend for a summer internship in the Hill Country. He will likely go on to grad school somewhere out of state.

For the first time in our 25 years of marriage, Sandy and I have no children at home. We each brought a child with us into our marriage and added two more. Now, all four are gone and we are beginning to understand what it means to have an empty nest. Although the children are gone, our nest remains feathered by our chickens, ducks and goose. We also have two dogs and two cats at home, along with some goldfish we use for mosquito control in our rain barrel and pond.

The critters occupy a lot of our free time, but it’s not the same as having children in the home. It also means that without Colton to help out, more of the chores fall on us. Actually, all of them fall on us, but that’s beside the point.

As our children leave the nest, I’m developing an appreciation for what my parents went through. Right after I graduated from college, I moved to Minnesota and then to North Carolina. I returned to Colorado for nine years and then was gone to Texas. It never occurred to me what my parents must have felt when we uprooted and left with their grandchildren.

I guess it’s only fair in that my parents raised me and my brothers hundreds of miles from their parents. My dad’s family moved from Arkansas to California just before he was born. My dad’s grandfather migrated to Arkansas from Illinois and his great-grandfather moved from Virginia to Illinois. Obviously, Southerns just can’t sit still.

My mother’s grandparents immigrated from Sweden and the family has mostly stayed in and around Omaha, Nebraska. Mom was the only one to make a move 500 miles away until years later when two of my cousins flew the coop.

There are times when I equate moving a thousand miles from home to southeast Texas to that of the early Texas pioneers moving here from parts east. We all came for a new beginning and untold opportunities. The opportunities we’ve had here have been well worth the move, although I still miss my family, friends and the mountains.

I can’t say that my move here will be my last, but most likely it is. Sandy and I love it here. We have great jobs and we’re thoroughly enjoying life on the hobby farm. I just wish the kids lived a little closer, especially when (or if) they start having children of their own.

In the meantime, we will enjoy family from afar and cherish the holidays and special occasions when we can all come together again.