Love is the elixir for life’s hurts

“Life is short, and it hurts. Love is the only drug that works.” John Coit, late columnist for the late Rocky Mountain News
John Coit was no philosopher and certainly didn’t have time for organized religion. What Coit did have was an incredible insight into the human condition. As a columnist for the Rocky Mountain News back in the 1980s, he had a knack for shining the spotlight on the marginalized side of life.
He hung out with bums, drug addicts, and an assortment of people that you’d flip a quarter to as you passed by, never to think of them again. His idea of covering the Super Bowl was from Bourbon Street, not the Superdome. He was an old-school journalist who lived as hard as he drank and smoked.
Coit died of a heart attack on Jan. 11, 1986, just 11 days after getting married in the lobby of the Rocky. He was 38. I could never relate to Coit personally because we lived such different lives. But I loved his columns and read them regularly. It turns out we both got our start in daily newspapers at the same place, The Daily Advance in Elizabeth City, N.C.
I loved that quote above from Coit and memorized it a long time ago. It jives with many of the messages in the Bible and is a truth that anyone can recognize. I was reminded of Coit and that quote this weekend after a campout with our Cub Scout pack at CubWorld in Conroe.
Pack 1000 is small, only about a dozen boys. A few weeks ago a boy by the name of Colby joined us. He is the only boy we have working on his Bear badge. He came in late in the game, but is enthusiastic and has been working hard to achieve the rank by the end of the school year.
Our campout was his first one with us. He is a quiet kid but didn’t shy away from being involved. Normally his grandparents or his mother bring him to meetings. This time his dad came with us. Marvin’s looks and personality reminded me of the late disc jockey Wolfman Jack – big in stature and bigger in heart.
On Saturday morning as we got up, fixed breakfast and prepared for a hike, Marvin stayed back and took it easy. He didn’t join us on the hike because of a heart condition that prohibited a lot of excursion. After lunch, he and Colby began packing up their gear and taking down their tent.
When I asked him why, he said that sleeping on the ground was too hard on him. That and Sunday was Colby’s 10th birthday and they were planning a big party for him. Marvin had Colby taking down the tent by himself. When I offered to help, Marvin called me off. He said Colby needs to learn to do these things himself and to do them right. I respected that. As they were leaving, the Pack gathered around and sang Happy Birthday to Colby.
I was sad to have them leave early but was happy that they were spending family time together for this milestone occasion in Colby’s life.
Focusing on the rest of the activities, I didn’t think much more of Colby and his dad. We finished the campout and all of us had a great time. On Sunday afternoon, we returned home, unpacked and resumed life as usual. Late Monday night, an e-mail was sent out from the mother of one of the other boys. Marvin passed away on Sunday – Colby’s 10th birthday.
“Life is short, and it hurts. Love is the only drug that works.”
I can’t begin to imagine what Colby is feeling right now as I write this. The rest of his birthdays will be burdened with the memory of the loss of his father. My heart and my prayers go out to Colby and his family. I only knew Marvin for a few hours, but they were happy ones.
I have pictures of Colby and his dad sitting around the campfire roasting hot dogs. The last picture I took of them was of Marvin instructing Colby how to roll up their tent.
Life isn’t fair. Life really is short, and to be sure it comes with a lot of pain. Life, however, comes with much joy and pleasure. Love is the fuel that makes life worth living. It’s a father and a son and final moments together, inseparable and happy. In the end, that’s the most any of us can hope for when our time is up.